Is It Their Motivation or Yours? The Art of Buying In or Not


I was having coffee with a friend of mine recently and we got on the conversation of buying into other peoples stuff and what it all meant.

If you spend anytime online these days which basically accounts for almost everyone (with the exception being my mom, I don’t think she’s read a single blog of mine).


Everyone has something to say and usually something to sell.


I’m not going to stand all high and mighty and say it’s wrong, I do it. I legitimately want to have you like me so that in the event I have a product or service at one point or another that you would consider buying it. Perhaps you already have….

And February always bring with it an even more intense energy to this noisiness. If you subscribe to anyone that’s made a business out of online you know what I’m talking about with Marie Forleo’s B-School; (FYI I did the program in 2013, at that point in my life and business it was really helpful) I’m not an affiliate. Make up your own mind about it.

Regard less, no matter what your currently being pitched, it’s intense when someone has something that they want to sell you; my inbox is insane right now with everyone’s bonuses and hype about this life changing opportunity and a reason why I should use their link over someones else’s.

FYI this isn’t a bash on B-School or this method. I’ve offered bonuses for programs that I’ve earned commissions for.

And it works great when the values of what you are paying for is being delivered and you are taking action towards your current dream or desire.

But here’s what’s hiding in the perfectly curated, drool worthy sales email of any product, and not just the ones being sold at this moment. They are designed to make you have FOMO – (Fear Of Missing Out)

And this isn’t news to you.  You know this stuff, but it’s amazing how fast the frenzy of wanting to be included takes over and you find yourself signed up for way too many things all at the same time.

Want MoreFor someone to create FOMO it’s totally fine, that’s what advertising is. But what happens when you have multiple emails for things that all have you having envy for other peoples lives and their promise that their product or service is the one that will change everything for you. You cant just buy them all – can you?!

Maybe you can, but then again maybe you don’t have to.

Either Way invoking your FOMO feeds THEIR MOTIVATION! You contribute to their bottom line.

It doesn’t matter what industry it is (weight loss, business, home decorating, meditation the categories can go on and on).  But at some point you have to ask yourself

Is it more about your DREAM or you contributing to theirs?

The copy sounds amazing – and it should they likely had professional copy writers do it or they’ve spent hours honing the words to make it 50 times easier for you to say “I’ll Buy It!”

But In between you celebrating YES, YES, I’ll do it? and then actually putting in your credit card info and clicking pay, you may want to take a breath and ask yourself a few questions.

Inquiry to Decide Who You Are Buying In To, You or Them.

What desire is this opportunity/program/service aiming to fulfil?

(Where’s the spark coming from)

Do you have the time to do it, now?

(A lot of online programs offer the opportunity to have lifetime access, do at your own pace. So why not buy it now and then get to it when you get to it? But here’s the reality, if you don’t have the time to do it when it’s happening the first time around, you likely will never get around to it. PERIOD)

Why this product?

This is a good place to identify all of the FOMO’s that are currently circulating in your brain creating frenzy and rush to NOT MISS OUT NOW.

Does this particular person or business align with your core values?

(In your list of FOMO, do you actually want to be this person and have their life – likely this is what they’ll be teaching you) and does this person’s business speak to you on all levels? Would you actually be friends with this person, or deep down do you kind of think their sleezy?

Can I afford this offering?

(Where’s the money coming from, if it’s a credit card how and when will this be paid off?)

Does this opportunity take me the whole way or is it a step of many?

(Acknowledging the process of making a desire a reality is a powerful piece of the puzzle, being truthful about the promise of great advertising helps to keep our perspective on what’s happening)

Am I ready to take action?

(or is there a list of ten other things that have to happen first?)

NOW, with a few deep breaths, you know if now’s the time to click pay or not.


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