You're Already Part of the Club. Happy Mothers Day
Mother’s Day is happening this Sunday. It’s the one holiday that I witness as the hardest day for women who are struggling with getting pregnant. All of the other holidays and celebrations have distractions that make the day a little more bearable and inclusive, but Mother’s day you either feel like you’re in the club or you’re not and you would go anything to be in it.
I’m going to go a little philosophical on you here, YOU ARE PART OF THE CLUB, RIGHT NOW JUST AS YOU ARE. From the very moment a woman decides and chooses to become a mother, the process has started. Your brain will forever be rewired, and the desire will only strengthen. Don’t deny this part of you while you wait for the physical manifestation of that desire. You embody this essence right now, and Mother’s day is yours to celebrate.
“The essence of motherhood is not restricted to women who have given birth; it is a principle inherent in both women and men. It is an attitude of the mind. It is love-and that love is the very breath of life. No one would say, ‘I will breathe only when I am with my family and friends; I won’t breathe in front of my enemies.’ Similarly, for those whom motherhood has awakened, love and compassion for everyone are as much a part of their being as breathing.” -Amma Chi
I want to leave you today with a meditation on this very feeling. It is one that I learned from my Teacher Dr. Randine Lewis at her retreats with The Fertile Soul. I encourage you to find a quiet space and read through it a few times. Each time you read it, let it sink in a little further, take it in, and feel it until it you believe that its true.
“You already embody the essence of motherhood, whether or not you have carried a child inside your body; whether or not you have been in the role of somebody’s mother. Let me show you how this is so.
Check your hands. Feel them from the inside. Are these hands that know how to caress another in need? Do they know how to wipe a tear off a cheek? Can they grasp the hand of another and let it know that it is not alone in this life? You have the hands of a mother.
Bring your awareness to your arms. Can your strong arms hug the body of one that is not as sturdy as yours is right now? You have the arms of a mother.
Check inside your eyelids. Have your eyes held the sight of love? Have they desired to pass it on? Have you seen another in need and felt the tug to heal them? Your eyes know. They have seen. You have the eyes of a mother.
Check your mouth. Has it kissed? Has it uttered gentle words to make another feel better? Your lips know how to mother.
Bring your awareness to your lap. Is this the lap that patiently waits to fold into an embrace, to allow your gifts of strength, comfort and nurturing hold another, accept another, rock and cuddle another, bear another’s difficulty and then let them get up and go on, better for their encounter with you? First can this lap bear your own burden and release it? You have the lap of a mother.
Check in the depth of your heart. Does it know how to love beyond any love that you may have been able to receive? Does it know how to break open for another; does it year to know that another tender life is just as, even more precious than its own? Then your heart knows how to mother.
You wear the body of the mother. You carry the heart of the mother. Those are the two most important elements of motherhood. Start to use them now. Give them practice.
We know that which we pay attention to grows stronger. Practice them without waiting for the object of your desire. Feel only the energy of your desire. It yearns to love. Practice loving. No individual soul will choose you based upon your special personality, your unique talents or life situation. You will be chosen if there is an opening for you. And you will pass on to it everything that has been unmet. Rehearse your readiness. Practice getting your own needs met, so that the essence of Motherhood can shine through you.
Use your hands to caress, use your arms to Embrace, use your lips to utter words of tenderness, and let your heart use you. This is the essence of motherhood."
Happy Mother’s Day!
XO Ashley