Picking Myself

Originally Posted Feb 4 2021

AHH! my book is starting to become a real thing. We just finished a major edit, have begun the layout and my book cover has come together so beautifully.

I’m in love!

Its taken a long time to get here. I feel like I’ve been talking about my book for FOREVER!Though as cliche as it sounds I truly believe that everything happens in its own divine timing.

So many opportunities for learning more deeply about myself, healing the parts of me that didn’t feel like I was worthy of having my words be in print, to coming to a place of reconciliation of multiple timelines of my life that were requiring closure.

This past summer, I had to come to a decision of how I wanted to distribute my book. Did I want to go for a traditional publishing deal, which had been my dream from the beginning or do I go it alone, create my own imprint and publish my book my way.

For months I meandered indecision and lists of pros and cons on what was the best for me. I spoke with multiple authors that I knew that chose either option. Some with healthy book advances and multi book deals and others that have done both and have now chosen to walk away from the big houses.

What I thought at first was that having a publisher back you was the only way to success, only to realize that that isn’t alway true, and that there can actually be more freedom, prosperity and authenticity by backing yourself.

Except I have this story, that traverses so many of my life’s journey this far that requires that I’m picked. Picked by teachers, mentors, coaches, clients, skating partners - to try out with a new partner you put a number on your back and skate a round the rink with 100’s of other girls and hope that your number is called - The conditioning runs deep.

However, perhaps it was the time stuck at home with my family, the simplicity of life that has endured in the space and so many hours with my thoughts, I’ve come to realize that this is not a story that I want to perpetuate any more.

I want to pick myself. I am going to back and stand behind myself. FINALLY!Its scary and at the same time so empowering. One step at a time, working on each task as it comes up to be completed.

The bonus of it all, is that the book will be out way sooner…IT’S COMING OUT THIS SPRING!And you can be the first to know when its ready to go by signing up here!

Which brings me to a journal prompt for you, as its one that I have reflected on for so many months now.

Where in my life, am I being invited to pick or back myself and my own knowing?

I would love to hear what comes up to the light.

XO