The Longer It's Been, The Harder It Feels To Start

Originally Posted Aug 11, 2017

Words are slow to form when you’ve not been intimate with them for a while. It’s been far to long since I’ve popped into your inbox. But alas I am cracking the door open and making room for the words to rise.

I first of want to say thank you to each of you that had reached out to support me with your love while I was struggling these past few months with my injury. The intense pain lasted for almost 6 weeks followed by numbness where I was unable to hold a pen or really type. I could barely needle, and so in an effort to remain true to my commitment to my clients I put my energy there as I had it.

The numbness has slowly been lifting though its still present when I push myself beyond what I should and while those capacities feel like they are almost half of what I’ve done before the boundaries have been clearly drawn out for me to see and feel.

And now as I write this first post, I feel a bit awkward and clumsy. Each week that passed where I couldn’t write has made it even harder to start.

What do I say? What am I doing again?

It reminds me of the heart protectors and how as we age they tend to get more rigid closing off the heart from its fullest expression and holding us back from being fully present. Leaving our heart peering thru the gates trying to grasp the environment and see if it’s worth begging its keepers to open up and allow it to shine.

Every time that it does this and instead holds back and retreats it gets harder to even look the next time. With enough evidence to support the very false belief that it’s not worth the time or effort, it just stops. And this right here is heartbreaking.

Because the turn around to all of this, is simply turning towards the opportunity, following the inspiration and ideas. Dropping into the expansion that is available to you at any given moment. And then the gates to everything open up and provide flow.

Flow of words, sensations, emotions, gratitude, Love.

More than you ever thought were possible for you at any one time.

So as I open the door to allow words to flow to you once again, I invite you to do the same in any area where you want to open. Just start..

Ride the wave and see where it takes you.

For me right now, this bring me back to you, that makes my heart feel incredibly full and happy.

XO Ashley