The Problem with Perfection
Originally Posted Oct 13, 2016
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about perfection and all the ways that it hinders us from living a life of love and legacy.
I grew up with Perfection being a theme for my life. In sports its something to strive for. The Motto “Perfect Practice Makes Perfect” rings in my head every time I am attempting to do something both professionally and just for fun.
In theory it was well meaning. The more perfect you could do a turn, jump or lift in practice created the neuromuscular pathways for you to successfully do it well or “Perfect” during performance. When all of your nerves were going crazy and you were standing in the middle of the arena all by yourself. Praying that all of your practice paid off and the body would know what to do.
BUT, and it’s a big BUT!
Striving for perfection in the pursuit of just living life is damaging.
There is no end in sight, where do you draw the line as to when something is perfect enough? Or how many of the things in your life must be or appear be perfect.
Perfection in real life creates the illusion that there’s no practice, no falling down and getting back up to course correct, no asking for help, no room for amateurs.
And trust me there is lots of falling down in practice. Cuts, bruises, stitches and a couple of concussions. I didn't get the nicknames Smash, Crash and Tumbleweed for being all grace.
The Illusion of no practice, leaves us with no room to grow, or the freedom to try something new.
How many times in your adult life have you tried something, weren’t good at it and then quit.
Maybe you had fun, had a good laugh, but because the finished product at the end didn’t end up with you feeling an overall sense of completion or success, you likely won’t try it again?
Perfection, breeds shame.
Whether the ideal of perfection is self imposed by you or societal, there is always someone that does not fit the mould. And you are made to feel shameful that you don’t fit in.
Perfection, breeds division.
Comparison and hierarchy are the only winners.. You are better than her or she is better than you.
Perfection is equal to isolation.
The pursuit of perfection keeps us alone, scared to let people in to see our real mess and our real selves. It prevents us from asking for support.
It prevents us from trying something and letting it be what it is.
Perfection relies on our need to control the outcome.
But when we control the outcome we have no room for evolution of our thoughts, ideas or of ourselves.
I for one am ready to let down the veil. I’m ready for you to see where my life is a mess. The places where I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m willing to be wrong so that I may learn. I’m willing to lay down my Perfect Practice so that I may live.
XO Ashley