I haven’t written anything in over a month.
That’s not to say I haven’t been working, I have, busting my butt actually, but as for writing and creating new content there’s been none.
I haven’t even been able to journal until just recently. Believe it or not, sometimes writing and opening up voluntarily to you, people in general even my own family is hard.
I will truthfully answer any question you ask, and I will share when the invitation is provided. But to freely share that’s a different story. Challenging doesn’t quite describe the feeling, it’s just painful and when you haven’t done it for a while it’s even harder.
For some individuals to freely share their thoughts and feelings is easy. They set the tone for who gets to be privy to their heart and they do it. I’m talking to you Wood and Fire Element people.
But I lack this talent as these two Elements within my alchemy are almost nil and so sharing just isn’t something that comes natural and it takes a commitment and practice to keep it going when I do.
But it’s no surprise that summer hits, in the peak of the Fire Element and I just want to shut down. All the protectors of my heart close up shop and try to insulate the heart from the intense heat, from the intensity of feelings that can come my way. And what I’m realizing in just being really quiet these past weeks is that they also protect me from the capacity of vulnerability that my heart just might want to share.
You explain let’s talk a little Chinese Medicine for moment,
The heart has 3 guardians. In Chinese Medicine the Heart is the ultimate ruler within the body. She’s the queen, the star, and like any good Queen she needs some bodyguards, a castle, and a maybe even a drawbridge to keep her safe from any possible crazy’s that are lurking in the bushes trying to catch a picture or start a coup. Our Heart has the same thing levels of protection
Each level protection has a particular job. The first line of defence is what we refer to as the Triple Burner. It governs communication between all of the organ systems relaying information back to the guardians and the heart. In essence it’s the little voice box you talk into where the person on the other side decides if the drawbridge will be lowered to let you into the castle.
The Triple Burner is what decides what ultimately gets let into and out of the Heart. It lowers the draw bridge to allow the Love and beauty of the Heart be seen and heard and receive that same communication right back.
The next guardian is the Small Intestine, think of this guardian as the personal assistant. It get the information that was allowed into the door and hears the pleas and then filters out what information is useful to the Queen, and what isn’t. Our Small Intestine uses it’s powers of discernment to separate the pure from the impure. The impure is sent on it’s way and is kicked out the door and the pure is granted permission for some face time provided it meets the security clearance.
Our Final Guardian is the Pericardium, it’s the organ that incases the heart to protect it. It does this for real in our bodies and energetically it decides who goes thru the door. It performs it’s security pat down to decide if the information or feeling coming in is meant for good, is warm, is loving or if it’s an attack or meant to hurt or assault the heart.
In a perfect world these three guardians keep the pure loving energy flowing in and out of the heart all of the time. But, life especially when we were younger and these guardians still had some lessons of their own to learn, they let some things slip thru the cracks and our open heart took a hit that it wasn’t expecting. Our heart’s fractured and needed repair, our guardians jumped into fix what happened. And sometimes maybe over reacted to the level of their protection making their walls and rules more rigid to ensure that it never happens again.
It doesn’t matter how or when it happened, each of us has a story as to how our heart got a little beat up or broken and how our guardians have made it harder for the door to become open. To receive Love and to Share it equally.
And when this very fact is realized to choose to pry open the doors even just a little can be awkward, uncertain and maybe even a little painful.
You have to choose to rip the band-aid off and start over.
Being vulnerable takes practice, at least if you want to do it consistently. So with that, I’m doing it, I’m back even though it feels especially scary this time.
But I’m committing, back to a weekly blog that you can count on in your inbox every week. And back to posting regularly on Social Media. Reach out I would love to hear from you, in all the ways in which you guardians are tending to the gate of your heart.
You may do so in the comments on the blog or email me, and please feel free to share or comment on what you would like to learn about the five elements and how they relate to your life.
XO
Photo Credit @kaihlatonai and @stefan_makwana
